Oh what to write? The possibilities are endless I'm sure although limited to some point.
Tonight I'm going into Newcastle with a bus full of young people to an event called ixth hour. Usually this event is held on a Sunday evening but tonight is a special occasion because Mike Pilavachi will be speaking. I've never heard him speak before but I've heard he's very good and I'm looking forward to hearing him. I suppose there's hope for me after all! :)
Another reason I'm excited about this evening is because in going to ixth hour I will not have to go to Peg it, the regular youth club we run on a Friday evening. I will be working later tonight but it's a change of scenery and that will be nice. I like changes of scenery every once in a while. I guess you could say that I suffer from "itchy feet" syndrome although that's a whole other post in itself.
Anyway that being said, I'm looking forward to Capernwray in like 2 weeks! AHH! I can't believe it's come so soon! I do not feel ready at all lol. I'm mentally ready to go but physically I have not even started to think about packing or anything like that. I really probably should!
Tomorrow I'm going to a Ceilidh that we're putting on as a fundraiser for the team going to Canada this summer. I have never been to a Ceilidh before so I'm sure it will be an experience. I'll try to remember to bring my camera so I can take pictures to possibly post. Basically it's like a big barn dance!
Next week Mike and Lisa are going off to Swanick and leaving me hear on my own! It's ok though because when they get back on Friday I'm leaving and going to Tamworth until Wednesday!
Anyway I'm going to go home and have some tea (supper) before I have to head off to Newcastle. Sorry for the boring-ness of this post. I'm sure I will have exciting things to write about soon!
Friday, March 31, 2006
Tuesday, March 28, 2006
This past Friday we got back from our evening youth club - which was surprisingly quiet, the week before we had one girl show up drunk, one boy decided to keep pulling the other lads trousers down, and one lad yelling extremely nasty stuff to me! Fun! - to find that that there was a meeting with a well known evangelist in the area. We were putting away our things from the club as people started arriving at the church for this service. I'd heard about this guy before, actually, I'd seen him before. When I was here two years ago with Team Canada we did an evening event in Newbiggen-By-The-Sea where this evangelist attended. He proceeded to tell the kids that if they wanted a high better than anything they needed an experience with the Holy Spirit. A couple youths mocked what he was saying so he had them come up so he could pray for them. They fell over and then everyone wanted to have a go. It was an interesting night! We came outside and the tires on our van had been slashed! He's very much an "all for it" kind of man and I know that he's known for an incredible healing ministry.
Anyway Mike was telling Lisa and I about this meeting and was pretty pumped to go, but I wasn't...in fact I wanted to get out of there as quickly as possible and just get home and have my tea and sit down and that disturbed me...
I got home and sat down for a couple minutes in my room and I looked inward for a bit and honestly I knew that if I went to this meeting, where this man was, I would probably be met by God and challenged and I'd have had to deal with things in my heart that I didn't want to face. I felt the kind of poke you sometimes get when you know that God wants to do something in you and you know it's not going to be a happy time.
Four years ago I would've jumped at the opportunity to go hear someone powerful preach. I remember once I drove across Ottawa, when I was scared of driving in the city, to go hear John Raymer at a Bill Prankard meeting because I wanted to meet and have a powerful experience with God. I did. Now, when there's a similar meeting on my doorstep, I run away because I don't want to face up to the inadequacies in my life at the moment. I don't want to face the reality that perhaps I have become a bit to comfortable in my Christian life and perhaps I have lost some of the passion that I once blazed with.
Perhaps I'm being a bit of a "Jonah" at the moment. Hearing God and running in the opposite direction. Full of zeal when it's comfortable to be so, but fearing it when I have to bring it into every aspect of my life.
I'm thankful God is patient and doesn't give up on us.
Anyway Mike was telling Lisa and I about this meeting and was pretty pumped to go, but I wasn't...in fact I wanted to get out of there as quickly as possible and just get home and have my tea and sit down and that disturbed me...
I got home and sat down for a couple minutes in my room and I looked inward for a bit and honestly I knew that if I went to this meeting, where this man was, I would probably be met by God and challenged and I'd have had to deal with things in my heart that I didn't want to face. I felt the kind of poke you sometimes get when you know that God wants to do something in you and you know it's not going to be a happy time.
Four years ago I would've jumped at the opportunity to go hear someone powerful preach. I remember once I drove across Ottawa, when I was scared of driving in the city, to go hear John Raymer at a Bill Prankard meeting because I wanted to meet and have a powerful experience with God. I did. Now, when there's a similar meeting on my doorstep, I run away because I don't want to face up to the inadequacies in my life at the moment. I don't want to face the reality that perhaps I have become a bit to comfortable in my Christian life and perhaps I have lost some of the passion that I once blazed with.
Perhaps I'm being a bit of a "Jonah" at the moment. Hearing God and running in the opposite direction. Full of zeal when it's comfortable to be so, but fearing it when I have to bring it into every aspect of my life.
I'm thankful God is patient and doesn't give up on us.
Thursday, March 23, 2006
Recovery
I'm back at work after 4 days off ill. I really haven't been that sick in a long time. I've been off one or two days here and there but not for four days straight. It's been really hard actually for a couple reasons.
First of all I'm not used to being ill. I was ill during the youth service we did in December but I managed to get out to part of it at least. This time I was confined to my bed with a temperature of 39 (102) for two days straight and had no appetite whatsoever. I guess maybe I've gotten to feel that I'm a bit invincible and it's always hard when you find out your not. In fact, I was half bragging to Sophie and Fran on Saturday evening that I hadn't been really ill for like 2 years and then -bam- that night I'm down lol.
Second of all I'm not used to sitting around doing nothing, I'm used to pushing myself to limits. After doing Team Canada for two years and another 18 months of youth work here you just get used to working like crazy and not slowing down. When forced to actually stop I didn't know what to do with myself. I tried to come into work yesterday because I was feeling a bit better but had to go back home. I'm just not used to not working!
It's probably a good thing I was forced to take some time off though because everything seems to be happening at once and I'm starting to feel a bit edgy about it all. Basically I've got two weeks left to prepare before I go to Capernwray and in that two weeks I've also got to try and make some swift decisions about this summer and how things are going to work out for next year (I've decided to come back again for those of you who didn't know.) Plus on top of that there are few other things on my mind that would not be prudent to blog about but they're things that are there and they're adding to the mass!
I was able to talk with my mom last night and that was really good. I miss her very much. She told me to just relax and take a deep breath, everything would work out and God has his hand on the situation. Sometimes all it takes is the most simple truth to bring a stop to anxiety.
I'm also heading down to Tamworth for a bit before I head off to Capernwray which will be nice, a bit of a breather where I don't have to work before I go off and a chance to clear some air.
Anyway I'd best get back to the British High Commission. You'd think I'd have committed their website to memory by now, but I still have to keep going back to look things up! I don't understand why I can't just be accepted without a visa, we still have the Queen on our money in Canada, how loyal is that?
First of all I'm not used to being ill. I was ill during the youth service we did in December but I managed to get out to part of it at least. This time I was confined to my bed with a temperature of 39 (102) for two days straight and had no appetite whatsoever. I guess maybe I've gotten to feel that I'm a bit invincible and it's always hard when you find out your not. In fact, I was half bragging to Sophie and Fran on Saturday evening that I hadn't been really ill for like 2 years and then -bam- that night I'm down lol.
Second of all I'm not used to sitting around doing nothing, I'm used to pushing myself to limits. After doing Team Canada for two years and another 18 months of youth work here you just get used to working like crazy and not slowing down. When forced to actually stop I didn't know what to do with myself. I tried to come into work yesterday because I was feeling a bit better but had to go back home. I'm just not used to not working!
It's probably a good thing I was forced to take some time off though because everything seems to be happening at once and I'm starting to feel a bit edgy about it all. Basically I've got two weeks left to prepare before I go to Capernwray and in that two weeks I've also got to try and make some swift decisions about this summer and how things are going to work out for next year (I've decided to come back again for those of you who didn't know.) Plus on top of that there are few other things on my mind that would not be prudent to blog about but they're things that are there and they're adding to the mass!
I was able to talk with my mom last night and that was really good. I miss her very much. She told me to just relax and take a deep breath, everything would work out and God has his hand on the situation. Sometimes all it takes is the most simple truth to bring a stop to anxiety.
I'm also heading down to Tamworth for a bit before I head off to Capernwray which will be nice, a bit of a breather where I don't have to work before I go off and a chance to clear some air.
Anyway I'd best get back to the British High Commission. You'd think I'd have committed their website to memory by now, but I still have to keep going back to look things up! I don't understand why I can't just be accepted without a visa, we still have the Queen on our money in Canada, how loyal is that?
Friday, March 17, 2006
Shamrocks And All That Jazz
A little bit of Irish history for you all on St. Patricks day
I came downstairs and said "Happy St. Patricks Day" to Anna and Sophie and they both looked at me and went "who??" I couldn't believe it. Back home we always had St. Patrick's Day parties at school and we all would wear green and eat cookies shaped like shamrocks. Perhaps we just overdo most holidays in North America...I dunno. It was always good fun though!
(This link is not actually about St. Patrick but the Blarney Stone. St. Patrick brought Christianity to Ireland and also drove out all the snakes. I did a project on him when i was in grade 9. I thought this would be fun though. I think that a family ancestor of mine must have kissed the Blarney Stone because there is a definite "gift of gab" in my family!)
(http://www.sacredsites.com/europe/ireland/blarney_stone.html)
I came downstairs and said "Happy St. Patricks Day" to Anna and Sophie and they both looked at me and went "who??" I couldn't believe it. Back home we always had St. Patrick's Day parties at school and we all would wear green and eat cookies shaped like shamrocks. Perhaps we just overdo most holidays in North America...I dunno. It was always good fun though!
(This link is not actually about St. Patrick but the Blarney Stone. St. Patrick brought Christianity to Ireland and also drove out all the snakes. I did a project on him when i was in grade 9. I thought this would be fun though. I think that a family ancestor of mine must have kissed the Blarney Stone because there is a definite "gift of gab" in my family!)
(http://www.sacredsites.com/europe/ireland/blarney_stone.html)
Wednesday, March 15, 2006
Agent Dollface: Hitwoman
I disposed of a dead body today. It was my first and I was surprisingly calm about it. I thought for sure when this day came I was going to be a wreck, an emotional disaster, but I was very cool and collected. But I suppose with a nickname like Agent Dollface what else can I be but smooth? (For those of you out of the loop Agent Dollface was a nickname bestowed upon me by my darling Father during times of play when I was younger)
The body was being kept for disposal in a holding tank at 11 Edward Street. The tank was full of water as well which hadn't really helped in preserving the nice features, especially as the skin had turned a sickly, translucent white, much like ET when he was dying in the film. I think this is the reason I was called in. The original hitwoman couldn't handle the sight but since I have a fairly strong stomache she called me for reinforcements. I think growing up with brothers and having to put up with their disgustingness helped me develop this strength of character. The body wasn't floating either for some strange reason, it had lodged itself inbetween rocks at the bottom. I had to grab at it with a net for a few minutes before I could losen it. My co-worker removed herself from the room as I went to work. It was over in less than 5 and the body was placed in a bag and then in a bin in the back alley. Hopefully it will be removed before it attracts any unwanted attention from the neighborhood felines.
Now how to tell the family members...
The body was being kept for disposal in a holding tank at 11 Edward Street. The tank was full of water as well which hadn't really helped in preserving the nice features, especially as the skin had turned a sickly, translucent white, much like ET when he was dying in the film. I think this is the reason I was called in. The original hitwoman couldn't handle the sight but since I have a fairly strong stomache she called me for reinforcements. I think growing up with brothers and having to put up with their disgustingness helped me develop this strength of character. The body wasn't floating either for some strange reason, it had lodged itself inbetween rocks at the bottom. I had to grab at it with a net for a few minutes before I could losen it. My co-worker removed herself from the room as I went to work. It was over in less than 5 and the body was placed in a bag and then in a bin in the back alley. Hopefully it will be removed before it attracts any unwanted attention from the neighborhood felines.
Now how to tell the family members...
Monday, March 13, 2006
Big Sigh
Stress:
a) A mentally or emotionally disruptive or upsetting condition occurring in response to adverse external influences and capable of affecting physical health, usually characterized by increased heart rate, a rise in blood pressure, muscular tension, irritability, and depression.
b) A stimulus or circumstance causing such a condition.
Perhaps I'm not so much stressed out now but I was this morning. Anna came into my room last night to talk about next year and my options for where I would stay. Initially I was fine, I was cleaning my room and had that to focus on instead. I had a stupid dream last night though and woke up feeling absolutely awful. I dreamt that I'd forgotten to go to the assembly we had today and went off and did something else instead. When I felt so guilty and tried to ring work to apologize but they were so angry with me. I woke up feeling just horrible about it even though it didn't happen. I got to work I think things just piled up on my shoulders. I wrote an email to friends venting my frustrations and suddenly my wall of reserve started to crumble and I tried and tried and tried....but the tears came. At least no one was around. I'm not overly embarassed to cry in front of people, but I think I just needed some space.
Hard days come. It will be ok. I know my future is secure in God's hands, but hard days still come.
"What strength do I have, that I should still hope? What prospects, that I should be patient? Job 6:11
"Though he slay me, yet will I hope in him" Job 13:15
"No one whose hope is in you will ever be put to shame" Psalm 25:3
"Guide me in your truth and teach me, for you are God my Savior, and my hope is in you all day long." Psalm 25:5
a) A mentally or emotionally disruptive or upsetting condition occurring in response to adverse external influences and capable of affecting physical health, usually characterized by increased heart rate, a rise in blood pressure, muscular tension, irritability, and depression.
b) A stimulus or circumstance causing such a condition.
Perhaps I'm not so much stressed out now but I was this morning. Anna came into my room last night to talk about next year and my options for where I would stay. Initially I was fine, I was cleaning my room and had that to focus on instead. I had a stupid dream last night though and woke up feeling absolutely awful. I dreamt that I'd forgotten to go to the assembly we had today and went off and did something else instead. When I felt so guilty and tried to ring work to apologize but they were so angry with me. I woke up feeling just horrible about it even though it didn't happen. I got to work I think things just piled up on my shoulders. I wrote an email to friends venting my frustrations and suddenly my wall of reserve started to crumble and I tried and tried and tried....but the tears came. At least no one was around. I'm not overly embarassed to cry in front of people, but I think I just needed some space.
Hard days come. It will be ok. I know my future is secure in God's hands, but hard days still come.
"What strength do I have, that I should still hope? What prospects, that I should be patient? Job 6:11
"Though he slay me, yet will I hope in him" Job 13:15
"No one whose hope is in you will ever be put to shame" Psalm 25:3
"Guide me in your truth and teach me, for you are God my Savior, and my hope is in you all day long." Psalm 25:5
Friday, March 10, 2006
Happy To Love
My pet peeve of the moment would definitely have to be my shoes. They're slowly wearing away on the bottoms and rocks have been finding their way inside so that my shoes rattle when I walk! Really I should just by some new shoes since these ones are really starting to come apart, but being the pack rat and sentimental person who attaches emotions to inanimate objects, it's a hard prospect to face. These shoes are the first thing that I bought when I got to England! My wickedly awesome friend Fi, took me shopping in Birmingham at the Bullring and helped me pick them out and even paid for half of the shoes. She's one of the most generous people I know. They're so comfortable and they're my favourite kind, the ones you slip on, no laces and heels exposed. Plus they had this kind of really soft slipper lining in them at the beginning which was so comfortable. It's since worn down some but they're still very comfortable. They're also Rocket Dogs which is a brand that I've been told is really trendy. Not that it means a whole lot to me, I just buy things that I like and if I'm lucky they happen to be cool.
Anyway my shoes have got my reminiscing about the last 18 months. I can't believe I've been here for a year and a half and am working towards possibly remaining for a 3rd year. People ask me what the hardest thing has been about being in England. Do I miss my family, my friends, my country, etc. I think one of the hardest things is being caught between two worlds. For example; lets examine my accent. I know that my Ottawa friends always made fun of the way I talked and told me that me and my brothers sounded English long before I'd even considered coming here, but now there's some definite truth to those statements. I call home and people say "Oh you sound so English!" Yet to the English I still sound Canadian...I'm stuck in this weird twilight zone where I'm neither Canadian or English! I pronounce words like "hand", "man", and pants very Englishly (apparently) yet still manage to keep a "twang" to what I'm saying!
On a more serious note I think it's harder feeling torn between two worlds when I hear about all the things going on back home and I start wishing that in some way I was still there and a part of it. But then I realise that even if I was in Canada I would still be having this problem. It's a partial curse from having moved around so much. I hear what's going on in Lloydminster and wish I was back there and could see everyone again, I hear what's going on in Ottawa and wish I could be back there and see everyone again, I hear what's going on in Thompson and wish I could be back there and see everyone again and when I'm back home in Canada I hear what's been happening in England and wish I could come back and see everyone again! I just can't win! On the one hand though there has been a major blessing in moving around so much. I'm so blessed to have met the people that I have throughout my life, especially some of my close girlfriends. -- I was thinking a bit about this the other day. How coming from a family of only brothers God still blessed me with so many families that had sisters in them to be my friends and sub-sisters. There seems to be a common theme of becoming friends with families that have two girls in them: Crystal and Amber, Shandee and Ladonna, Leanne and Terri, Sarah and Maia, Christina and Charmaine, Sophie and Francesca.... Although this theme is common it is not limited as I've met a lot of other amazing "sisters" on the way. Tanys, Karyn, Fi, Heidi, Marea, Heather, Lisa....all the girls from Team Canada...I could go on. Please don't be upset if you read this blog and I have not mentioned your name, I haven't forgotten you!--
So anyway, I've digressed but the title of this blog is ...and I digress... so what do you expect?
One of my most favourite quotes ever, if not my most favourite, is by Hannah Hurnard from Hinds Feet On High Places. It is where the Good Shepherd is asking Much Afraid if she would like to go up to the High Places and have hinds feet and in order to go there has to have the flower of Love already blooming in her heart:
"Then will you let me plant the seed of true Love there now?" asked the Shepherd. "It will take you some time to develop hinds' feet and to climb to the High Places, and if I put the seed in your heart now it will be ready to bloom by the time you get there."
Much-Afraid shrank back. " I am afraid," she said. "I have been told that if you really love someone you give that loved one the power to hurt and pain you in a way nothing else can."
"That is true," agreed the Shepherd. "To love does mean to put yourself into the power of the loved one and to become very vulnerable to pain, and you are very Much-Afraid of pain, are you not?"
She nodded miserably and then said shamefacedly, "Yes, very much afraid of it."
"But it is so happy to love," said the Shepherd quietly. "It is happy to love even if you are not loved in return. There is pain too, certainly, but Love does not think that very significant."
That has to be one of my favourite quotes..."it is so happy to love." And every time I think of all the people I've had to say good bye to or don't know when I'll see again next it comes to mind and reminds me that I was blessed to have had the time with them that I had. I think it's also so hopeful...no matter how much you've been hurt or what kind of pain you've been through because of others, it is still happy to love!
If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Matthew 5:46
Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. Deuteronomy 6:5
Anyway my shoes have got my reminiscing about the last 18 months. I can't believe I've been here for a year and a half and am working towards possibly remaining for a 3rd year. People ask me what the hardest thing has been about being in England. Do I miss my family, my friends, my country, etc. I think one of the hardest things is being caught between two worlds. For example; lets examine my accent. I know that my Ottawa friends always made fun of the way I talked and told me that me and my brothers sounded English long before I'd even considered coming here, but now there's some definite truth to those statements. I call home and people say "Oh you sound so English!" Yet to the English I still sound Canadian...I'm stuck in this weird twilight zone where I'm neither Canadian or English! I pronounce words like "hand", "man", and pants very Englishly (apparently) yet still manage to keep a "twang" to what I'm saying!
On a more serious note I think it's harder feeling torn between two worlds when I hear about all the things going on back home and I start wishing that in some way I was still there and a part of it. But then I realise that even if I was in Canada I would still be having this problem. It's a partial curse from having moved around so much. I hear what's going on in Lloydminster and wish I was back there and could see everyone again, I hear what's going on in Ottawa and wish I could be back there and see everyone again, I hear what's going on in Thompson and wish I could be back there and see everyone again and when I'm back home in Canada I hear what's been happening in England and wish I could come back and see everyone again! I just can't win! On the one hand though there has been a major blessing in moving around so much. I'm so blessed to have met the people that I have throughout my life, especially some of my close girlfriends. -- I was thinking a bit about this the other day. How coming from a family of only brothers God still blessed me with so many families that had sisters in them to be my friends and sub-sisters. There seems to be a common theme of becoming friends with families that have two girls in them: Crystal and Amber, Shandee and Ladonna, Leanne and Terri, Sarah and Maia, Christina and Charmaine, Sophie and Francesca.... Although this theme is common it is not limited as I've met a lot of other amazing "sisters" on the way. Tanys, Karyn, Fi, Heidi, Marea, Heather, Lisa....all the girls from Team Canada...I could go on. Please don't be upset if you read this blog and I have not mentioned your name, I haven't forgotten you!--
So anyway, I've digressed but the title of this blog is ...and I digress... so what do you expect?
One of my most favourite quotes ever, if not my most favourite, is by Hannah Hurnard from Hinds Feet On High Places. It is where the Good Shepherd is asking Much Afraid if she would like to go up to the High Places and have hinds feet and in order to go there has to have the flower of Love already blooming in her heart:
"Then will you let me plant the seed of true Love there now?" asked the Shepherd. "It will take you some time to develop hinds' feet and to climb to the High Places, and if I put the seed in your heart now it will be ready to bloom by the time you get there."
Much-Afraid shrank back. " I am afraid," she said. "I have been told that if you really love someone you give that loved one the power to hurt and pain you in a way nothing else can."
"That is true," agreed the Shepherd. "To love does mean to put yourself into the power of the loved one and to become very vulnerable to pain, and you are very Much-Afraid of pain, are you not?"
She nodded miserably and then said shamefacedly, "Yes, very much afraid of it."
"But it is so happy to love," said the Shepherd quietly. "It is happy to love even if you are not loved in return. There is pain too, certainly, but Love does not think that very significant."
That has to be one of my favourite quotes..."it is so happy to love." And every time I think of all the people I've had to say good bye to or don't know when I'll see again next it comes to mind and reminds me that I was blessed to have had the time with them that I had. I think it's also so hopeful...no matter how much you've been hurt or what kind of pain you've been through because of others, it is still happy to love!
If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Matthew 5:46
Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. Deuteronomy 6:5
Wednesday, March 08, 2006
Thursday, March 02, 2006
Grace and Computers should not be allowed in the same room together.
I'm sitting in the office right now trying to get all the next youth service publicity finished. Why is it that technology works absolutely fine for you until you need it? Every single time I go to print these posters the printer decides to act up, and if it's not the printer it's something else. This time, even though i've managed to get the printer working, the new photo paper we've got is too thick and keeps jamming in the printer. On top of all that the computer I'm using - which Lisa and I named Elmer when it first arrived - seems to be regressing into it's previous geratric fits. Let me digress about Elmer a bit. I have no idea what kind of computer it is or any of the other details but I do know that when it arrived it was the slowest machine alive on the face of the planet. I'm sure I could have got my hair dryer to be more productive than this computer. It would take about 15 minutes for it to actually get it turned on and functioning let alone trying to open a programme....heaven forbid because that would be asking way too much for this machine. (See my hair dryer is more productive because I can dry my hair in less time than that!) Anyway I think the problem was something to do with not enough memory and we finally got around to adding more, however you actually do that, and it's been fine. It was like this computer that was slowly aged and dying had been fully restored to it's youth. Now I'm thinking though, that it was only a mid life crisis, and Elmer has lost his boost of energy and is slowly aging and dying again. Perhaps it's time to make him a new name plate that again says "Elmer: The Geriatric Computer"
Great, now it has quit printing full stop...
The question that now remains: will I be able to finish before the day is over?
Tuesday of this week I was able to take the day off and go to a print course which was a lot of fun. Anna had signed up for this four week course and since she's away in India for a week she arranged for me to take her place. It was lino printing and although what I produced wasn't the absolute best I'd ever done, it was still fun to get away from work for a bit and do something else I really enjoy. One day, I will manage to find time to do more art....one day.....
I had housegroup again last night and this week was much less intense than last week. I have to admit that I've been thinking a lot about what happened last week and a challenging comment from my sister in law (as usual) has also added some fuel to the fire. I suppose if I could sum up the extent of my thoughts in one point it would be this: It's all about people. I don't mean that life is all about people and that I should go out and spend the rest of my time trying to please them, of course the whole point of life is God, but it's also sharing that life with the people around you. As Jason, another leader and friend, said, a relationship with God is not only vertical but horizontal as well. Anyway I guess I've just thought about where I've come from the past few years and how I think I was a bit hard headed at one point and was writing people off from my life because I didn't think they were at the same place I was with God. There's nothing wrong with having high standards, I guess it's just finding the balance between them and grace. Anyway I'm sure I could go on forever but I won't. I'll end here because I really need to get these posters sorted!
I think I ran out of grace for this computer a long time ago!!!!!!!!!
Great, now it has quit printing full stop...
The question that now remains: will I be able to finish before the day is over?
Tuesday of this week I was able to take the day off and go to a print course which was a lot of fun. Anna had signed up for this four week course and since she's away in India for a week she arranged for me to take her place. It was lino printing and although what I produced wasn't the absolute best I'd ever done, it was still fun to get away from work for a bit and do something else I really enjoy. One day, I will manage to find time to do more art....one day.....
I had housegroup again last night and this week was much less intense than last week. I have to admit that I've been thinking a lot about what happened last week and a challenging comment from my sister in law (as usual) has also added some fuel to the fire. I suppose if I could sum up the extent of my thoughts in one point it would be this: It's all about people. I don't mean that life is all about people and that I should go out and spend the rest of my time trying to please them, of course the whole point of life is God, but it's also sharing that life with the people around you. As Jason, another leader and friend, said, a relationship with God is not only vertical but horizontal as well. Anyway I guess I've just thought about where I've come from the past few years and how I think I was a bit hard headed at one point and was writing people off from my life because I didn't think they were at the same place I was with God. There's nothing wrong with having high standards, I guess it's just finding the balance between them and grace. Anyway I'm sure I could go on forever but I won't. I'll end here because I really need to get these posters sorted!
I think I ran out of grace for this computer a long time ago!!!!!!!!!
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